Parent or Friend?

Parenting in the 21st Century is a great challenge! It's not that the basic principles of parenting have changed, it is that there are so many more influences both in and outside the home competing for our children's attention, loyalty and commitment. Regardless of their age, children, yes even young adults and into adulthood, need structure. Just as we need highway markers, posted speed limits, traffic lights and warning signs to keep us safe and successful in our driving, our children need clearly defined limits and guidelines to keep them safe and successful in life.

Two important principles of parenting are; provide clearly defined limits/guidelines and be a Parent first and a Friend second.

Providing clear limits / guidelines can best be accomplished when we understand the thought processes of our children and what it is that determines their behavior. This can best be achieved by learning and then implementing the principles of Subconscious Restructuring (SR). Through SR we better understand our kids and they better understand themselves. They become less prone to fall prey to unhealthy influences and live more self-directed lives. They become very aware of choices and consequences of behavior. They also learn how to make positive changes in their lives and how to learn from mistakes. As we better understand our children, we can then establish and maintain healthy guidelines and limits to ensure healthy growth and progress in their lives.

Being a Parent first and Friend second keeps familial roles clear and balanced. Some parents try to be a best friend to their children. This is commendable, however, if your child views you primarily as a peer, a door is open for confusion and questioned credibility. We have all had and lost friends. Friends will come and go in life. Parents are there for life! Being a friend to your children is very important. Being a parent first, is most important! Children need parents to be the lighthouse on the shore and the reliable source of guidance that will be consistent and unwavering.

Learn what determines your behavior and your children's behavior through Subconscious Restructuring. Be a Parent first and a Friend second. These are keys that will make parenting more effective, successful and even fun.
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Fear Phobias Anxiety

When it comes to getting over things, getting over fears is probably the biggest obstacle people have. Fears themselves fall into two main categories: phobias and anxieties. Phobic fears are when you see something and immediately you're overwhelmed with fear. Anxiety is a slower, gradual build-up of fear, where people go inside their minds and make pictures of terrible outcomes. People think they are afraid of things, but they are not. It's not the object (snakes, heights, dogs) that makes you afraid, its your brain. We know this because other people can be around the same things and they don't get afraid. The question becomes; what is the person who feels fear doing inside his head and, even more important, what is the person who feels calm or confident in those situations doing inside his head?

Be Aware of the Words we Speak

Recent studies have revealed that every word we speak, think or hear stimulates and results in a chemical reaction in the brain. Quite simply, the language we use has a direct impact on the listener's neurology. The language we use when we talk to and about ourselves also effects our own neurology. Our words directly effect our emotions. The way we think, determines what we will feel. Our feelings or emotions result in behavior. Are your thoughts giving you the life you want? Perhaps it is time to change the way you think!