THE WHEELBARROW

         THE WHEELBARROW 

At the end of a long work day, an employee was leaving his factory, pushing a wheelbarrow through the gate to head home. Inside the wheelbarrow was a small box.

The security guard stopped the man and said, “What have you got in your wheelbarrow?”

“I’ve got a small box,” he said.

“I know you’ve got a small box,” the guard said. “What’s in the box?”

The worker replied, “The sawdust from the floor. At the end of the day, it gets swept up and is thrown away. I needed some, so I put it in the box, and I’m taking it home.”

The guard looked inside the box and sure enough it was filled sawdust. He sent the worker on his way.

The next day, the same thing happened.

The third day, same thing.

And the fourth day.

On the fifth day, the worker again came through with a wheelbarrow and a box of sawdust. This time the security guard said, “It’s you again with your wheelbarrow and your sawdust. I’ve got a feeling that you’re up to something. I think you’re actually stealing something. Look, why don’t you tell me what you’re stealing, and I promise I won’t report you.”

The worker said, “All right. I’m stealing wheelbarrows.”

Our lives are often a bit like that. We’re so focused on a small box of sawdust that we never notice the wheelbarrow carrying it. In other words, we can be so distracted by the little things in life that we miss the bigger picture.

KNOW THY SELF!

             KNOW THY SELF

We are triune beings. We each have a physical, emotional and spiritual aspect to our identity. To be happy, it is important to be healthy in each if these areas. We need to maintain balance in these three areas. To create and maintain balance I suggest we ensure that our needs in each of the three areas are being met. To meet our spiritual needs we can cultivate a relationship with our creator. We can read and study the holy scriptures on a daily basis. We can regularly worship and pray. 

For our physical needs (that's needs not desires) we can keep ourselves in the best possible physical condition for our age and physical dexterity. 

To meet our emotional needs, we ought to get to know ourselves, we should ensure that we are only in healthy relationships. If not healthy, we need to change the relationship or end it. We can maintain a calm, focused and balanced emotional life. When we are feeling down, negative, stressed, anxious, out of sorts, or out of balance, I recommend taking two simple and specific actions. 1) Change your environment! Go outside, go for a walk, go for a drive, go to a different room, etc. when we change our physical environment we change our mental state which results in a change in our feelings both physical and emotional. 

2) Change your thinking process. Keep this simple. Instead of thinking about what you want or need, take a few moments and think of at least 10 things for which you are grateful. Change your point of view or perspective in a situation. Ask yourself,"what can I learn from this?"We can also change our thinking process by asking,"what would _________ do in this situation?" Think of a mentor, or a hero, someone you respect and admire. What would they do?  These two simple actions help restore emotional balance and help us to get to know ourselves better. 

1) Change your environment. 

2) Change your thinking process. 

It is by small and simple things, great things are brought to pass. 

DEFINING MOMENT

         DEFINING MOMENTS

The caterpillar goes about its business, and lives the life that it knows, the life of the caterpillar. At some point in its life, it begins to build a cocoon around itself. It closes itself off from the outside world for a little while... closes itself off from outside influences and opinions. And while it is inside the darkness, it becomes acquainted with its true self, and out of this true self, without anything being added from the outside, without any special education from the external, comes the butterfly!

We each have within us the potential of greatness! To be someone totally unique with amazing and specific talents. There comes a time in our lives when we must choose. Whether to be what circumstances, opportunities or the lack thereof, and those around us say we should be, or... we can become still, and listen. Seek within ourselves and discover the unequaled person we are meant to be. It's a DEFINING MOMENT in our life!

A GREAT DAY

       A GREAT DAY

I enjoy a great day!  I would imagine that most people enjoy having a great day. The best days I've ever had all have one thing in common. I was totally focused, completely absorbed in what I was doing. I wasn't stressing or worried about tomorrow, I wasn't regretting yesterday, I was in the present day. When we invest ourselves in today, completely, we create the environment and conditions for joy. 

“Look To This Day 

For it is Life, the very Life of Life. In Its brief course lie all the Verities and Realities of your existence; 

The Bliss of Growth;

The Glory of Action;

The Splendor of Beauty;

For Yesterday is but a Dream,

And tomorrow is only a Vision: 

But Today well lived makes every Yesterday a Dream of Happiness, and Every Tomorrow a Vision of Hope. Look well, therefore, to This Day!”

PAIN, A NOT SO GENTLE REMINDER

PAIN, A NOT SO GENTLE REMINDER

I enjoy a clear sun shiny day, it lifts my spirit and invigorates my soul. When I am met with a day that is overcast, dreary, dark and cloudy, I remind myself that the sun is still there. Time does not stand still or stagnate. Time continually moves on, moves forward and in doing so constantly creates conditions for change, growth, progress and joy. I was recently thrown into a situation that reminded me of the importance of these principles. I was awakened early last Sunday morning by the most severe abdominal pain I have ever experienced. For hours I suffered trying everything I knew to relieve the pain but to no avail. Every passing minute seemed to be unending. Time was not my friend! Finally, my sweet wife took me to the hospital emergency room. My wife being an ICU nurse facilitated my getting rather timely attention and assistance. Then began the questions, the examinations, the diagnostic tests of blood work, x-rays, CT scan, ultrasound and physical examinations all the while giving me dose after dose of the strongest pain medications yet relief was not found. During this process the OnCall surgeon was brought in to consult as well. This amazing and gifted man was so gentle and concerned. I knew by reputation that I could trust him.  I've never before experienced a doctor like this. He was truly what one thinks of when you think of a physician. He genuinely expressed concern and would with a gentle touch reassure me that he would not rest until I was okay.  All the activity culminated in an emergency surgical procedure to find the cause of such intractable abdominal pain. With patience, confidence and skill, the gifted and intuitive surgeon finally located the unique and obscure condition within my  abdomen causing the severe pain and intervened with the surgical procedure to correct it. As I have passed through the minutes, hours and now days of recovery I have been in awe of the healing process. Feeling a little better each hour and day I can envision my return to good health. No longer is my vision of health impaired by the storm clouds of severe pain. I know that beyond the clouds restored health is shining brightly. When the disasters strike. When the challenges arrive. When the impossible is dropped right in front if us blocking our path, let's remember that we have not changed. Life has not changed. A temporary situation or conditioned has simply occurred. That same eternal physician who was there with us on the sunny day is still there with us when the clouds arrive. The great physician will help us through whatever spiritual, emotional or physical surgery we need if we will but remember He is there and call upon Him for help, wisdom, relief and peace. 

A CRUISE

                 A CRUISE

 

I recently had the opportunity to go, accompanied by my wife, on a cruise for the first time in my life. I've had a week now since our return to collect my thoughts. 

In the early hours of this morning I was reflecting on one night in particular of the cruise. My wife and I had strolled up to one of the upper decks of the ship. We walked outside and sat together on one of the deck chairs. Holding my sweetheart in my arms, we both sat silently as the sea breeze blew into our faces. I looked at the reflection of the moon on the water and gazed all around me where I could see nothing but ocean as far as my eyes could see. For a moment I felt so small, aware of my nothingness compared to the great Atlantic Ocean. I then recalled the words of the psalmist who wrote,"When I consider thy heavens the work of thy fingers, the moon and the stars, which thou hast ordained; what is man, that thou art mindful of him?"

It was a humbling and almost lonely feeling that crept into my soul. I continued gazing out at that now dark and ominous looking sea. I thought of a stormy and tumultuous sea commanded,"peace, be still." by the Master. I thought of his teachings, the worth of a soul, we are literal spirit children of a Heavenly Father, 'what I have done Ye shall do and more.' I felt such a warmth and peace. I no longer felt so small. I was reminded of the great worth and potential that rests within each of us by virtue of our spiritual DNA.  Regardless of the temporal circumstances of our birth or any earthly obstacles, we are each capable of great things. Let's live like we believe it!

A MOMENT

           A MOMENT

Have you paused at all today, to appreciate the simple things? We frequently hear reference to the importance of being grateful. We are presented with lists filled with examples of the things for which we should be grateful. I have recently been impressed with the importance of pausing and briefly meditating on the things in my life THIS DAY for which I am grateful. The things in our present day and even the present moment. Things like; the sunrise, knowing I have a Heavenly Father, the feeling of clean socks on my feet, a warm shower, fresh clean towel, the smell of a dryer filled with recently dried clothes, smell of freshly baked cookies, a vehicle that starts up immediately, a vehicle with air conditioning, the smile, laughter and hug when greeted by a grandchild, a tiny child napping in your lap, a spouse's smile, a hug, a personable and polite employee at a drive through window, a comfortable chair, the sense of taste, the ability to read, living in a free country, the powerful gift of thinking, and pondering. 

These are but a few of the things in THIS DAY for which I am grateful that I have written down in the moment. 

There are so many more things for which we can be grateful in this very day. There is power in gratitude. There is learning in being grateful, there is peace, and healing. 

Take a moment, pause, ponder, heal. 

WHO AM I?

WHO AM I?

I've worked as a psychologist for some 30 years. Clients have shared a wide variety of reasons for seeking help. Several shared the following; they said,"I feel like I'm a fraud. I feel like I'm just pretending to be who I am and no one knows the real me. I live in the constant fear if being discovered."

Are you living an authentic life? Are you genuine as a person? Do you convey to others a person you think they want you to be? Do you live only as a reflection of the people around you so you'll fit in? Sometimes we fear being rejected if we are our true selves. We automatically believe people wouldn't like us, so we create a persona to be when at work, or church, with friends and family. The reality is, you were designed to be unique, you were not meant to be a copy of anyone else. The universe, the world, your community, even your family need you to be who you truly are. When you drop the facades, you begin to live an honest life and the ever present pressures and fear disappear like a vapor. We will reflect in our behavior some of our life's  influences. The miracle of individuality blossoms when we respect those around us by respecting ourselves through living a genuine and honest life. What life are you living?

REST AREA AHEAD

  REST AREA AHEAD

If you've traveled on the interstate highway system in the U.S. you saw signs for 'Rest Areas.' These are generally nicely constructed areas with immediate and easy access just off the interstate that have public bathrooms, well lighted parking areas, usually vending machines and in some areas even onsite security personnel. These little oasis' were built to provide drivers a place where they could literally stop and rest. A safe place to get out of the vehicle, stretch, walk around, have a snack or even take a nap. When utilized, it allows drivers to remain fresh, attentive and alert during their travels. A rested driver is a safe driver. An added benefit is that when you are rested, you can enjoy the journey so much more. You notice the beauty of your surroundings, the changing landscapes, the sunrise or sunset. 

We are each on a journey. Our daily lives are made up of changing landscapes, different weather, even sunrises and sunsets. On this journey, the changing landscapes may be watching our children grow from toddlers into young adults. Perhaps the arrival of grandchildren. The final days and passing of a parent, a loved one, a childhood friend. Whether our journey involves actual travel across the country or is within the walls of our homes, we each have a unique journey. If we hurry and push all day long just to get through and to get done, we may miss out on some of the most precious moments or landscapes on our journey. If we just press and stress forward with the highway fatigue of life, we miss the whole point. Our journey is meant to be enriching, filled with periods of laughter, moments of tears, even silent solitary times of learning and understanding. Please, take the time to pull into the 'Rest Areas,' of your life. It will enrich your journey beyond anything you can imagine. The 'Rest Area,' signs will look something like... a child filled with excitement wanting to tell you all about it 'right now.' A teenage daughter with tears in her eyes, confused at why her boyfriend decided to break up. The gentle touch of a spouse hungering for some time with you all alone. A blossom filled tree you've never noticed before. A friend in tears from laughter. A rain storm that sounds so relaxing and causes the air to smell so clean. A wonderful meal at a restaurant where you took the time to savor each delicious bite. Watch for the 'Rest Area," signs. Take the time to pause, enjoy, and regenerate. You may be amazed at how scenic your journey. You can choose to enjoy your life! 'Rest Area Ahead.'

THE GIANT

           THE GIANT

The towering enemy strides into the Valley of Elah. He stands 9 feet tall, and his coat of armor, made of many small bronze plates, glimmers in the sunlight. The shaft of his spear is wrapped with cords so it can spin through the air and be thrown with greater distance and accuracy. Goliath looks invincible.

But David knows better. While Goliath may look like a giant and act like a giant, in contrast to the living God he is small. David has a right view of his Heavenly Father and therefore a right view of the circumstances. He sees Goliath as one who is defying the armies of the living God. He confidently appears before Goliath in his shepherd’s clothes, armed with only his staff, five stones, and a sling. His confidence is not in what he has but in who is with him. 

What “Goliath” are you facing right now? It may be an impossible situation at work, a financial difficulty, or a broken relationship. With your Father in Heaven all things are small in comparison. Nothing is too big for Him.  Have you spoken with Him lately? By simply closing your eyes and bowing your head you can be immediately in His presence. Talk to Him and then take the time to listen to his reply. With God, you are always in the majority!

SMALL AND SIMPLE THINGS

  SMALL AND SIMPLE THINGS

It’s one of the simplest and most powerful principles on the planet. Can be applied remarkably quickly to most    

situations. Works really well and gives disproportionate    

rewards. If you are not using this as part of problem    

solving, goal achievement or planning process; you are missing out. In fact you are almost certainly expressing    

too much energy, and getting less than optimal results. 

The principle I’m referring to? The Pareto principle also known as the 80/20 rule. In it’s most basic form it says: 

80% of the output is produced by 20% of the inputs. 80% of the consequences are generated by 20% of the causes. 80% of the results are created by 20% of the efforts. You’ve probably heard that before. But have you asked yourself: 

  "Which 20% of my actions are creating 80% of the results I experience on a day to day basis?" Let that question sink in. Even further. When you do, you will start to see    

opportunities to work less and get more, far more often. 

The name of the game becomes...  How can I get greater return with less effort and having more fun? 

Thankfully you don’t need to have super-powers to be able to leverage this law. It requires only that you become more curious about cause and effect… causation and    

consequence in your own life. 

And willing to do a little thinking up front. The great news is, this law can be applied anywhere. For example take the context of a personal    

problem you are facing. 

If you’ve got an area you are struggling with, ask yourself: 

Which 20% of my actions are creating 80% of my problems? This powerful question presupposes that there    

are a small set of actions that are generating a disproportionate part of the    

problem. And guides your super-smart brain to dial in    

on those. Are you doing a lot and getting little in return? Are little actions/behaviors causing you major problems? Could a small or simple change make big differences in your life?Make a change. Simply do something different. By small and simple things great things are brought to pass. 

THIS MOMENT

         THIS MOMENT

Unhurry yourself, learn to be where you are. Enjoy the present moment. Fully experience the present moment. Your children aren't in the future, they're here, now. The sunrise or sunset isn't in the future or in the past, it's now, this moment.  A Moment Is Designed To Be Tasted. Your day should be savored, not gulped down. Your life is a special and glorious gift from your Creator. Today is a collection of Moments. Display each as the  Golden Prize from God Himself. Do not rush through them. Stop long enough…to drink deep from The Cup of the Moment. View each Moment as a wonderful Fountain. Stop. Stand still. Take a deep drink from the sweet waters of the Present. You see, Today is really the only place you will ever exist. When you arrive in your future, you will rename it…Today. Yesterday is in the tomb. Tomorrow is in the womb. If you do not know how to enjoy the Today that exists, you probably will enjoy few days in in your future. As the singing group The Who so wisely once stated,"no matter where you go, there you are!"

IN A HURRY!

      IN A HURRY!

We get convinced by society and media sources that to be responsible we should always be in a hurry. That is simply nonsense! Hurrying ignores the present. Hurrying rejects rewards hidden in the present. Hurrying creates the illusion of completion. 

Many years ago, a young couple became obsessed with finding gold. They sold their little farm and launched their search. It became a lifetime of wasted effort. They eventually ended their searching in England, bankrupt. Years passed. They finally accumulated enough money and help from

friends to return to the United States. After arriving, they decided to revisit their little farm, the birthplace of their gold search. A strange scene welcomed them. They were forbidden to enter the area. Government security was everywhere. Why? Their little farm had become

government property because it was now…the second largest gold reserve on the North American continent.

In their hurry to search for gold, they had not even examined their own property!

Unhurry yourself. Live simple, steady and deliberate and you'll get so much more accomplished than if you hurry.  All too often, we get in a hurry and look for success and happiness "out there" when it was "right here" all along. We missed it because we were in a hurry!

SLEEPING OR AWAKE?

  SLEEPING OR AWAKE?

A Native American elder said recently,"Everybody's hurrying but nobody's going anywhere. People aren't living they're only existing. They're growing away from spiritual realities. These days people seek knowledge, not wisdom. Knowledge is of the past; wisdom is of the future. We're in an age now where people are slumbering. They think they're awake, yet they're really sleeping. But this is a dangerous age, the most dangerous in human history. People need to wake up."

We have become a people who let the media, politicians and celebrities tell us not only what we should think but also how we should feel about any given issue. We are discouraged to think for ourselves. We are told to be politically correct. If we think for ourselves we may have a different opinion and that may make others feel uncomfortable. 

I believe that out of discomfort comes growth, strength and greater understanding. Think your own thoughts. Begin by stepping away of the hurried rush of life. Slow down, practice gentleness and through simply being, you experience your own thoughts, gain balance and become whole. 

BRAIN LANGUAGE

      BRAIN LANGUAGE 

In order to take control of our brain, we need to understand the language of the brain. Our brain processes all input via our five senses. We label and process our experience as pictures (visual) sounds (auditory) feelings (kinesthetic) taste and smell (olfactory). We have each developed a primary representational system. Some of us think primarily in pictures, some think primarily in feelings and so on. The system we use determines the words we choose. A visual person may be heard to say," I see what you're saying." "I can picture that." A kinesthetic person may be heard to say,"I'm not comfortable with that." I feel good about that." It's important to become aware of your brain language and the brain language of others. When two primarily visual persons talk, they establish quick rapport and they easily understand each other. When a visual person and and a auditory person talk, they are literally speaking two different languages and have a more difficult time understanding each other. Once you've learned to shift your language to that of the person with whom you are speaking, you have great control over your own life. You also know how to better communicate with yourself. Ask someone to describe their living room. A visual person will draw you a picture in words of the rooms layout and furniture appearance. A feeling oriented person will use words describing how the room feels and the feel of the furnishings. Be aware of brain language. It gives you back greater control on your life. 

FAMILIAR ATTRACTION

FAMILIAR ATTRACTION 

Another unique way our brain works is that as human beings it is in our nature to be attracted to that which is familiar. People remain in unhealthy relationships because that is what they know. We also have a natural fear of the unknown. So often, we will continue in misery because we believe, " the hell I know is better than the hell I don't know." Abused children often run away from foster care back to the home of abuse because that is what they know and therefore there is no uncertainty. A person may wonder why they continually get into relationships with the same type of unhealthy person.  They  are attracted to people who turn out to be controlling, an alcoholic, abusive, etc. It is being attracted to that which is familiar. We have been taught for years that the strongest inner need of man is the need to survive. I believe our strongest need is to seek out that which is familiar. It doesn't take long when looking at clouds to begin seeing shapes of things 'we know'. 

How do we take control of our brain? How do we break the cycle of being drawn to negative or hurtful familiar things? Stated simply, we need to change that which is familiar. This can be accomplished by taking small intentional steps outside our comfort or familiar zones and learn new things. Read about people or situations with descriptions of behaviors and values that are new to you. Visit groups and places with people who are different from your typical experience. Take some time and evaluate past relationships and situations  identifying common elements. Those are the familiar things. Once you are 'aware' of what it is that's 'familiar' you know where to begin to make changes. That's half the battle. Change one element in an equation and the answer or outcome will change. Take control of your brain by "changing" the things that are "familiar" to you. 

WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT?

WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT?

In learning to control our own brain, it's important to understand why we do what we do. A significant aspect of that is what motivates you. What is it that gets us to do the things we want to do and the things we must do but maybe don't really want to do? That would be motivation. 

As human beings, the way our brain works is, we are motivated in one of two ways. We are either motivated by moving 'toward' something we desire / want or we are motivated by moving 'away' from something we don't want / desire and are seeking to avoid. Some people are motivated to get up out of bed and get to work to 'avoid' being fired from their job. Other individuals are motivated to get up and get going because they look forward to the work they do. Some people buy flowers for a significant other on their birthday to 'avoid' an argument for having forgotten or disappointing them. Others buy flowers for their significant other because they love to see the surprise in their face or enjoy the feeling of making them happy.

Take control of your brain by becoming aware of how you are motivated. Then start choosing how you will be motivated. Assess the different areas of your life. How are you currently being motivated? Are you moving 'toward' something desired or 'away' from something feared or undesirable? Negative motivation robs our creativity and reduces our quality of life. We can change the nature of motivation by changing our thinking. Maybe you don't like your job, but you enjoy the freedom the paycheck gives you. Explore that area as a beginning to a shift in motivation. The moving 'toward' motivation is most powerful and continually opens new vistas in life. It gives you greater flexibility and control in your life. 

So, WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT?

LAW OF REVERSED EFFECT

LAW OF REVERSED EFFECT 

Our brain / mind is forward moving / thinking. It is always moving in the direction of our dominant thought. A key principle of controlling our own brain is to focus on getting the brain to "do" something, not "stop" doing something. If I say to you,"don't think of the color blue". What is the first thing you do? You think of the color blue in order not to think of the color blue. So then it's too late. Instead, if I said,"think of the color green." What do you do? You think of the color green. Control the direction of your thinking by continually thinking of what you want, not of what you don't want. If someone says to you,"now, don't be angry but..." What does your mind do? It immediately accesses being angry. Once again, it's too late.  My son used to spill his milk all the time. I was continually telling him," son, don't spill your milk!" What was I actually doing? I was ensuring he'd spill his milk. When I changed what I was saying to, "son, keep your milk in the glass unless you're drinking it." Amazingly, the spills stopped! The principle, get the mind to "do" something not "stop" doing something. Focus on what you really want, not on what you don't want. 

OUR BRAIN

               OUR BRAIN

I think it's safe to say that we all have a brain. I think we all also know of someone who causes us to wonder if they have a brain. Our brain operates according to some basic universal principles. When we are not directing our thoughts and running our own brain, our brain is being programmed  and run by someone or something else. Other people's comments may be running our brain, we may be continually reacting to their spoken expectations. Television and radio may be determining how we feel. It's as if someone else is driving our bus. They may have the best of intentions but they may not be driving where we want to go. It's time to take back control of your own life. We can do this by first learning how our brain works. Then applying the principles in our own lives. We can choose how to feel. We can decide to change a behavior. We can decide who and how we want to be and become that person. Over the next few days, I'll share some basic principles of how our brains work. You can test / apply them right away and experience the amazing results. It's time to drive your own bus!  It's time to start using our brains for a change. 

A THOUGHT ON THOUGHTS

  A THOUGHT ON THOUGHTS

A small and simple thing that is very powerful is a thought. The thing to remember about thoughts is that we become what we think about most of the time. Where you are today, what you are today, is the sum total of all the thoughts that you've had. If you remember, feelings, actions, outcomes, they all start with thoughts. So what you've thought up until now has got you to where you are today. That same process is working right now second by second, this very moment.  If you want to make a change, you need to change what you're thinking, and how you're thinking. An important fact is that what dominates your thoughts influences your results. What you think about most is affecting your results. Now here's where it gets real interesting. A simple yet extremely powerful key is that you've got to start thinking about what you're thinking about. We do this by asking ourselves questions like, "Why do I think that?" "Why am I saying that?" "Why do I feel like this in this situation?" "How do I feel about feeling angry?" "How do I feel about feeling frustrated?" So the place to begin is to start thinking about what you are thinking about!

MINNIE VACATION

          MINNIE VACATION  

Life in general is changing rapidly. The speed at which we now live can be exhausting. Companies and we as individuals are expected to do so much more with so much less. For so many, the day is busy and full from the time they awaken in the morning until they finally drop into bed late at night. They survive by looking forward to their annual vacation. This is that time away from work to relax, play, regenerate, explore new places and really live! This is a period of vacation and re-creation. It's when we can honestly live.  Let's quit "surviving" and allow ourselves to "live" everyday. A small and simple thing we can do that brings great benefits  is the minnie vacation. Everyday, take about five minutes, sit or lay down getting comfortable and using visualization, go on a minnie vacation in your head. Make it so real that you can see, hear, feel, smell and taste where you are and what you are doing. This five minute experience will allow for relaxation, regeneration and happiness along the journey. Remember, the subconscious mind cannot tell the difference between a real or imagined experience.  It is very powerful! Once again, small and simple things. 

A SIMPLE READ

      A SIMPLE READ

It is indeed by small and simple things that great things are brought to pass. Here now is another small thing that reaps great benefits. There are so many books available to us now. Our local libraries are full 

of books that we can borrow and read at no cost. If you have a smart phone, through various apps you can gain access to hundreds, even thousands of books. All too often we select a book only to lose interest part way through our reading. Now we've spent and wasted all that time. A very effective way to scan a book and gain at least 50% comprehension thus making better use of your reading time is the topical sentence approach. This is simply reading only the first sentence in each paragraph on every page of the book. In a well written book, the first sentence in a paragraph tells you what the paragraph is about. You can now fly through a book in a fraction of the time. If you find it interesting you can go back and read it. If you don't like the book, you've spent little time and can move on to another one. Another example where small and simple things bring great things to pass. 

JUST THINKING

             JUST THINKING

The truth is that this is the moment when we are either enjoying our life or not enjoying our life. What we are thinking at this moment is creating a feeling within our body now, and our experience of life tomorrow. There is no "out there" that can cause us to suffer because everything that unfolds in our world is a projection of what is going on within. Our world is a mirror of what we think and feel on the inside. It's not the world that causes the stress we feel, it's our thoughts about it, the story we tell ourselves of how it is. 

Stress or anxiety doesn't really exist in the world, but a lot of people engage in stressful thinking. When we are tense, relaxed, happy or sad, we are "Just Thinking!"

BE WHO YOU ARE

      BE WHO YOU ARE

Does it seem to you that you spend your whole life trying to please and help other people only to be rebuffed and falsely judged? Here is a thought to consider, "A man has need of tough ears to hear himself freely judged." You know no matter how careful and conscientious we may be, someone is always sure to misunderstand our actions and our attitude. If a person doesn't do anything, people will find fault with what he hasn't done. If he does something, then people will find fault with what he has done. You cannot please all the people all the time by trying to be all things to all people, then you never get a chance to express what you really are. Be who you really are. To be true to yourself, you must be yourself. When you are yourself, when you are genuine, not everyone will like you but they will respect you. Be who you are!

CHANGE DIRECTIONS

    CHANGE DIRECTIONS

When you make changes in your life you may temporarily get lost. If you are lost, double check your GPS and stop at a gas station and ask for directions. Make your course corrections and reach your destination. 

If you frequently lose jobs, get in to debt, have problems maintaining relationships, ask yourself, "Am I taking the right path?" It could be a serious problem. Whatever the path you're taking, it's showing you the unwanted results. 

You need to stop at the gas station of life and ask for further directions. AA, NA, Gamblers Anonymous, a credit counselor, or a therapist can change the course of your life. 

Become aware and admit you're lost. With the right guidance, you can reach the destination of happiness and success. 

ENERGY IN WORDS

ENERGY IN WORDS

A small and simple thing that is very powerful in each of our lives is our choice of words. The words we use create our world and make us who we are. Words possess power, they create focus and release energy. As we hear the words we ourselves speak, we ensure their fulfillment through our emotions and behavior. Our words define our thoughts, our thoughts generate our emotions, these in turn determine our behavior. We can change who we are by changing what we say. As we enjoy these changes, we can make them permanent through repetition. As we change, our world changes. The simple truth is, as we change our words, we change our world and the way we experience life. 

STEER CLEAR OF DRAMA

STEER CLEAR OF DRAMA

As we journey through life, we meet people who seek to involve us in their storms, their conflicts, negative emotions and drama. They stink and stir up our lives.

Bring to mind a time when you were walking on the sidewalk and saw dog poop in your way. What did you do? You stepped around or over it. Now imagine another person who sees it but steps right into it. Don't let other people’s drama stir up and stink up your life. Watch for the storm clouds and the poop! Don't step in it. Do what you can to help, but stay clear of their drama and negativity.

BE STILL AND MOVE

      BE STILL AND MOVE

Meditation is considered by most to be a small and simple thing.  It is also something that can result in great things. A simple but powerful form of meditation can be done at the beginning or end of your day. Set aside 5 to 10 minutes for your meditation practice. In a quiet place where you are unlikely to be interrupted, sit very still and close your eyes. Then bring into your mind something you want to have happen in your life. Vividly imagine this event or goal. Take special care to experience the desired goal paying attention to what you would see, hear and feel. Make it as real as you can. When you do this, your subconscious mind can't tell the difference between a real or imagined experience. It will cause you to react and respond as if it's really happening. It will also embrace the experience as a goal and will initiate the thoughts, feelings, and behaviors to make it happen, to make it reality. After your 5 or 10 minutes of 'mental rehearsal' or 'visualization', you will notice that you feel different. You feel better. Get up and go about your day or evening. You have now put into action a mighty force in your behalf. 

CHUNKING DOWN

CHUNKING DOWN

We have been addressing change and making simple changes in our lives. We are generally resistant to change, and are too intelligent to put in any work without a good reason. It's important to have a reason for making a change  because change usually means work. But without change...nothing changes! As we have recently been discovering, a small or simple step can generate a big result. When the decision was made to put a man on the moon, it wasn't done in one giant leap. It was a succession of small simple steps, that together, resulted in a great accomplishment. In their thinking, they started from the moon, the goal, and worked backwards. This is also effective when applied to our goals. What is your goal? What will it look, sound and feel like when you reach the goal? Now, working backwards, what steps need to be taken to get from your goal to where you are right now? This is breaking the process down into smaller, doable, steps. Breaking the journey down into smaller, simple steps is known as chunking down. Perhaps a different way to state it would be, "One small step for man, one giant leap for mankind."

MANAGING OUR THOUGHTS

MANAGING OUR THOUGHTS

Thought management is critical to making effective changes in our lives. Our thoughts are so powerful! If we don't manage our thoughts, our thoughts will manage us. Here are 7 ways to manage or control your thoughts. 

STOP

You are the boss, so as simple as this sounds, the first thing you can do is to send a command to yourself, say Stop (STOP!). A direct command, given with a firm order tone, will interrupt the behaviour, like stopping you in your track.

SWAP

You can replace a negative thought by a positive one; I like to do a double swap, so, not only swap one for another one, but swap one for 2 other ones. Keep a list of positive, happy, healthy, constructive thoughts, and swap away.

STORE / SHARE

You can store it AND this is only half of the strategy; remember, you do not want to store it, as in ignore it, you want to store it, and re-access later, by sharing it with a supportive person: a friend, a colleague, a coach, a mentor. Someone with an outside perspective, an objective one, who will help you move forward.

SWITCH

You can do something else: call a friend, watch a movie, go for a walk, a run… there are so many things you can do; here you want to select an activity that you can do straight away, once the negative thought comes in.

SHHH

You can go to sleep or meditate, to free your mind; you can either meditate on your own, in silence, or have your favourite music on, or thanks to a relaxation cd /track or, a visualisation, guiding you to think of something else and relax.

SPECULATE 

This comes from Dale Carnegie, who said in his How To Stop Worrying And Start Living book, “First ask yourself: What is the worst that can happen? Then prepare to accept it. Then proceed to improve on the worst.” So, ask, accept and proceed.

SCRIBE

You can start writing; from head to paper, write about what you are thinking to free your thinking place. Whatever is it that you are thinking as long as it stays in your head, it is a jumbo-mumbo mess (!), so write it down; and write it exactly as you are thinking it.

JOURNEY vs DESTINATION

JOURNEY vs DESTINATION

In the process of change we are sometimes so focused on the goal or outcome that we totally miss the joys in the journey. How often have you been so focused on a destination for holiday / vacation that you didn't enjoy or even notice the sights along the way? Victor Frankl gives counsel I think relates to to this as well. He says, "Don't aim at success: the more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it. For success, like happiness, cannot be pursued; it must ensue, and it only does so as the unintended side effect of one's personal dedication to a cause greater than oneself or as the by-product of one's surrender to a person other than oneself. Happiness must happen, and the same holds for success: you have to let it happen by not caring about it. I want you to listen to what your conscience commands you to do and go on to carry it out to the best of your knowledge. Then you will live to see that in the long-run - in the long run, I say! success will follow you precisely because you had forgotten to think about it."

Perhaps he is reminding us that happiness isn't a time or place, it's a state if being, a state of mind. 

WHAT DID YOU CHOOSE?

WHAT DID YOU CHOOSE?

A simple thing that always brings great things to pass is that of making a choice. We always have a choice. Although it seems instantaneous, we still choose how to respond. We choose how to feel. We choose to feel angry. We choose to feel happy. We choose to feel sad. It was Victor Frankl who taught us the reality of our ability to choose. After years in a concentration camp, he learned and taught about our ability to choose. He taught us that, "When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves." He then clarified,"Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms - to choose ones attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way." It's simple yet so powerful!

LET GO FOR CONTROL

LET GO FOR CONTROL

Another small and simple thing that makes a great difference is with the issue of control. When we seek success by controlling everything in our life and in every situation, we are actually making things more difficult. Constantly exerting control leads to tension and results in decreased quality of performance. Control isn't something we must do, it's something we allow. Here's the simple truth, the more we let go, the greater control we have. It sounds so wrong, even impossible. Small and simple things bring great things to pass. The key, the more we let go, the greater control we have. Rather than try and force a situation, allow it to be. Letting go brings more control. Loosen the grip on a weapon and your accuracy improves. The more you let go, the more control you have. All of our skills are much more efficient when approached with an attitude that allows rather than forces performance. The mantra one more time, the more we let go, the more we have control. 

THE BIG LITTLE CHANGE

THE BIG LITTLE CHANGE 

Today my routine day ended in a very non-routine way. My day ended with an unscheduled visit to my dentist. There, it was my privilege to experience the joy of tooth extraction. My dentist removed a molar that had served me well for several decades. In recent weeks, the molar had become a source of pain several times when I would bite down to eat. It had become abscessed two or three times. Ultimately, it was painful all the time and was constantly oozing infection. What had at one time been a reliable and valuable servant, was now an impediment and source of pain. In order to remain healthy, I had to have the tooth removed. It was a painful experience, but I'm now free of a source of pain and infection in my life. I can now press on with life. 

Like my tooth, at some time in our lives, we will all have to acknowledge that something that had once served us well is now impeding our life and our progress. It could be an old habit learned early in life. Perhaps a friendship that has turned infectious. Acknowledge that it must go, and remove it! A little thing, once removed, can be a big change in our life. A big little change. 

SIMPLE IMPROVEMENTS

SIMPLE IMPROVEMENTS 

A subtle, even small change, can often result in significant change and over all improvement. Something as simple as changing the way we tie our shoes creates new neural pathways in our brains. These new nerve pathways generate new feelings and thoughts. As we make these small changes, we push the limits of our comfort zones. The fear signal that comes up when you are outside your comfort zone is a signal to be "aware" and not "beware". Fear is part of the process of change. The simplest things in life feel uncomfortable until you get used to them. It's important to continue when we feel uncomfortable. It's so often not that we "can't"do things, it's that we "won't" do them. 

STRENGTH IN SIMPLICITY

STRENGTH IN SIMPLICITY 

Continuing with the theme, by small and simple things great things are brought to pass. At the core of the concept is simplicity. A small amount of water allows a plant to thrive. Too much water and the plant dies. A little sun and the plant thrives. Too much sun will kill a plant. When solving a problem, keeping the issue simple, the lowest common denominator, allows for rapid and effective problem solution. When we seek to elevate a situation to something much bigger or more complex than it really is, it suddenly becomes much more difficult to resolve.  It is in the simple that there is great strength. 

PREPARATION

PREPARATION 

“If I had six hours to chop down a tree, I would spend the first four hours sharpening the axe.”               Abraham Lincoln

There is great wisdom in this quote attributed to Abraham Lincoln. It reminds us of the importance of preparation. A very important way to prepare when implementing new behaviors in our lives is to imagine ourselves behaving in the new way first. This mental practice allows the new behavior to become more natural before the actually situation or event. The simple act of mental rehearsal prepares us to be at our best. Take time to sharpen the axe. 

COMFORT ZONE

            COMFORT ZONES

One of the greatest challenges to making changes in our lives is dealing with Comfort Zones. What do I mean? We all operate, day to day, within parameters with which we are comfortable. They can be social, emotional even situational. In every area of our life, we have established a type of safety zone. This zone is made up of what we will and are willing to do in these areas of our lives. Much has been said and written about change and how we must get out of our comfort zones in order to change. I disagree! A wise and effective approach to change is to extend or expand our comfort zones. You don't have to jump out of the frying pan into the fire. Begin by walking to the edge of the pan. What I'm suggesting is that there is nothing wrong with taking baby steps towards change. It doesn't have to be all at once. Making changes incrementally will still get you to your desired outcome. By expanding your comfort zone, once change is achieved, it's already part of you and a natural response. 

BEGIN AGAIN

              BEGIN AGAIN

You've had one of those days. Between family and work, then add the car issue and maybe a sick pet, you're spent. You had little time to yourself. It's important to make time for yourself and for implementing the changes you've selected for your life. Even just a few minutes for yourself goes a long way toward helping you become the person you want to be. As you feel better you help improve the environment for all those around you. Most important is to remember, the sun will come up tomorrow and with a fresh new day comes the blessing and opportunity to begin again. 

NO ONE LIKE YOU

NO ONE LIKE YOU

Making changes improving our lives should be a very rewarding experience. As we take simple steps to accomplish the changes, we allow ourselves to relax more and be ourselves. It's so important to be genuine. Be the unique individual you were created to be. You possess a combination of gifts and talents that are unique to you and you alone. When you live true to yourself, you experience freedom. No more pretending to be someone you are not. No more looking over your shoulder in fear of being discovered by others to be a fraud. Don't be afraid of being yourself. It brings joy to your day and real happiness to your life. 

CAPTURE A MOMENT

CAPTURE A MOMENT

We each experience the world in a unique and very individual way. It isn't our surroundings or environment that determine how we feel or the dominant emotions in the moment. It is our dominant thoughts and personal perspective that ultimately determine our experience. We can choose our focus. There is a very basic law of the operation of the mind which states, that which you do send out shall return to you again. When we look for and expect disappointment, regardless of where we are, we will find it. When we look for and expect to see beauty, we will find it. Two people may see a toddler in the park. The toddler is covered in mud and dirt. One person may grimace in concerned at seeing an obviously neglected little child. Another person may see the child and smile in delight as they imagine all the fun the little person has been having. 

We are surrounded with choice moments every day. If we will learn, early at the beginning of this year, to look for beautiful, precious moments, in whatever surroundings we find ourselves, we will capture precious and memorable moments. Begin by seeking to capture a precious moment at some point every day. 

FIX IT!

                FIX IT!

Making changes as part of the New year involves learning new simple ways to change, and resolving old ever present problems once and for all

A man decided late one day that a very tall tree in the yard had to go. He was tired of cleaning up after it all the time.  His yard was a mess because of it.  So, he decided to cut it down. Now, he had a chain saw, but not the right size.  If you're going to cut down a big tree you need a big chain saw. He thought,"I have a small saw so it is going to take a long time."  Well, it got dark.  he was determined to finish the job. Then he stood up to see how big around the trunk was. He kept cutting away at that tree piece by piece.  He knew exactly where it was going to fall and when. Then he sat down. There was one problem, he didn't have all the facts. The first thing about taking care of a problem you have is to know the problem inside and out.  I mean if you are going to rid yourself of a problem that has been causing you trouble

get rid of all of it.The only way you can do it is to know all the details and as stated earlier, have the right tools.

So far he knew he didn't have the right tools.  That was causing new problems.  Like taking too much time. Finally he got to the very last chunk of tree and could hear the cracking sound of a falling tree. He couldn't believe it.  It was actually falling exactly where he wanted it to go, he thought with a big smile.

So, what was the problem?Have you ever cut down a tree? Ah, there was a problem.  You see, it was HUGE!" He never considered how big the tree was.  From the base

looking up he knew it was tall.  But he didn't know how tall.

When it fell exactly where he wanted it to fall, it fell "longer" 

than he thought it would.

It crashed and then all he heard was screeching car brakes.

It actually fell onto the highway.

Sure this is simply a story about a man cutting down a big tree, but it has a far reaching lesson we can all apply to our lives.

Four important steps when facing a problem

1.  Be prepared.

2.  Have the right tools.

3.  Find out ALL the facts.

4.  Be ready for it to be bigger than you thought. Because like trees problems can have deep roots and reach higher and wider than you imagined.

"How big is your tree?"

CHANGE IT!

                CHANGE IT!

It's amazing to me that as complex as we know the human brain to be, it can only process one emotion at a time. You can't feel two different ways in the same moment or at the same time. You may vacillate rapidly between two feelings but you experience only one feeling at a time. Knowing this, we can develop creative ways to change how we are feeling. If you are experiencing an emotion you don't want, do something you know, that for you, elicits a different feeling or emotion. If you find yourself driving and stuck in slow moving or even stopped traffic and begin stressing or feeling  anxious, try singing the national anthem out loud. Notice what that does to the way you are feeling. Try this or something similar. You can take control of your emotions.  The important thing to remember is that we can experience only one emotion at a time. Don't like what you're feeling? Change it!

VISION

            VISION

Decide for this year that you owe it to yourself to live an extraordinary life and inspire others to do so in the process. 

Decide the kind of life you want to have and more importantly the type of person you want to be. To have this desired life and to become this person, we must take control of our thoughts. Our thoughts always precede any action or behavior. It is also our thoughts that come together and create our vision or image of our desired life. If everything follows thought, if our world is shaped primarily by our visions and how we respond to them, then this gives us the power and choice to choose empowering visions. It seems to be the case that great achievements follow persistence of a vision. Time after time, those who have achieved great status, influence, and success in society, those who are both internal and externally satisfied, have all held on to a strong mental image. This sounds like and appears to be a small and simple thing, but it is those simple things that bring very big results!

EYE OF THE STORM

     EYE OF THE STORM

We continue on the daily journey of a new year. My recent writings have focused on making changes for the coming year. More important, I am emphasizing and sharing methods, tools, techniques that are very simple to implement yet bring great results. The informal theme has been,'by small and simple things are great things brought to pass'.

Our mind is very powerful yet tender and complex. It's subject to strain and stress both from within and outside, and too much unresolved pressure can result in poor functioning. Emotional and mental fatigue can be just as exhausting as physical or bodily weariness. A way to stay healthy and keep on going is to apply a very simple yet powerful technique. At least once a day return to that quiet place of communication with the subconscious mind or what some people call the 'Inner Self.' Simply take five minutes to rest quietly with your inner source of life and vitality. There is a point of inner calm and stillness deep within. Sit still, get quiet, and listen. This quietness, this calm center is the only place our subconscious or Inner Self can get to us. If we want to experience this peace we must put ourselves consciously in a position to receive it. This is a secret of renewal of strength; mental, physical and spiritual. Along with regenerating your being, as you sit quietly and listen, your subconscious will release to your awareness ideas and insights along with tremendous calm. You will also experience the confidence of a mind that has found its true center. 

Simplicity of character is the natural result of profound thought. 

KEEPING EMOTIONS SIMPLE

 KEEPING EMOTIONS SIMPLE

Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does!

The past few days we have been addressing the topic of change. We've also been addressing the fact that it is by small and simple things that great things are brought to pass.  We all want to be a better person in this new year and we'd like to be more successful as well. We allow ourselves to become overwhelmed when we think of personal change and generating success according to our personal definition. As human beings, so much of what we do and even the decisions we make we make based on how or what we are feeling. Our emotions are a major driving force in our lives. It's important to remember that our emotions are directly connected to our thoughts. We can control our thoughts if we choose to. By directing our thoughts we can control our emotions. As we choose our thoughts and consider our interactions with other people, it's important to remember that we all view and experience life differently. We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are. Many people view this as a major obstacle to having a happy life. Every event and situation of life has within in tremendous potential for good and a positive outcome. We must first choose to look for it until we see it. The activities, events and happenings in our lives are all neutral emotionally. They do not have emotion or feelings attached or assigned to them. It is when we view, see or experience them that we generate and assign emotion to them. Why else can two people have the same exact experience yet have totally different feelings / emotions about it?  Here now is another small and simple action to apply in our lives that will bring tremendous results.  Our thoughts determine our emotions. Thoughts become increasingly powerful the more attention we give them. If you don't want to feel down or sad, don't give attention to the thoughts that result in those emotions. Give your attention to the thoughts that inspire you, the thoughts that result in happy or what you would call good emotions. It's amazing how doing this small simple thing results in such amazing changes and outcomes. After a brief period of practice, it becomes a natural response and you don't have to consciously focus on it as much. It's a small and simple thing, but oh the power for change it packs!

MY HAPPY PLACE

      MY HAPPY PLACE

Albert Einstein said,"imagination encircles the world." You have the ability to literally create and live whatever life you desire within your imagination. You and I actually use our imagination every day.

Unfortunately we tend to use our imagination against ourselves. We tend to vividly imagine all the things that can go wrong in our day and in our life. We vividly imagine what we don't want to have happen. We create in our minds scenarios of how other people are going to behave and act towards us. We create negative scenarios and expectations for ourselves ensuring that we will experience disappointment. Just as we can create a negative experience for ourselves, with this same ability, we can create neat, upbeat and good things for ourselves. I recently had to undergo an MRI. If you've never experienced an MRI, it can be very stressful if you're the slightest bit chlosteraphobic, which I am.  You are secured to a mobile table and then they slide you into a long and very narrow tube (the MRI Machine). It's so small, you can't turn around or move. You lay in this tight, small tube for around an hour. In this tiny enclosed space for that length of time, I could have experienced major anxiety and trauma, but I didn't, I used my imagination. I spent time walking along the beach in Destin Florida with my wife. We had so much fun. We then played at the Magic Kingdom at Walt Disney World in Florida. We were having a blast and about to go on Splash Mountain when I was informed the MRI was complete. 

We can transform our lives by using the amazing gift of imagination to our benefit. Let's talk more about this ...tomorrow.