BRAIN LANGUAGE

      BRAIN LANGUAGE 

In order to take control of our brain, we need to understand the language of the brain. Our brain processes all input via our five senses. We label and process our experience as pictures (visual) sounds (auditory) feelings (kinesthetic) taste and smell (olfactory). We have each developed a primary representational system. Some of us think primarily in pictures, some think primarily in feelings and so on. The system we use determines the words we choose. A visual person may be heard to say," I see what you're saying." "I can picture that." A kinesthetic person may be heard to say,"I'm not comfortable with that." I feel good about that." It's important to become aware of your brain language and the brain language of others. When two primarily visual persons talk, they establish quick rapport and they easily understand each other. When a visual person and and a auditory person talk, they are literally speaking two different languages and have a more difficult time understanding each other. Once you've learned to shift your language to that of the person with whom you are speaking, you have great control over your own life. You also know how to better communicate with yourself. Ask someone to describe their living room. A visual person will draw you a picture in words of the rooms layout and furniture appearance. A feeling oriented person will use words describing how the room feels and the feel of the furnishings. Be aware of brain language. It gives you back greater control on your life. 

FAMILIAR ATTRACTION

FAMILIAR ATTRACTION 

Another unique way our brain works is that as human beings it is in our nature to be attracted to that which is familiar. People remain in unhealthy relationships because that is what they know. We also have a natural fear of the unknown. So often, we will continue in misery because we believe, " the hell I know is better than the hell I don't know." Abused children often run away from foster care back to the home of abuse because that is what they know and therefore there is no uncertainty. A person may wonder why they continually get into relationships with the same type of unhealthy person.  They  are attracted to people who turn out to be controlling, an alcoholic, abusive, etc. It is being attracted to that which is familiar. We have been taught for years that the strongest inner need of man is the need to survive. I believe our strongest need is to seek out that which is familiar. It doesn't take long when looking at clouds to begin seeing shapes of things 'we know'. 

How do we take control of our brain? How do we break the cycle of being drawn to negative or hurtful familiar things? Stated simply, we need to change that which is familiar. This can be accomplished by taking small intentional steps outside our comfort or familiar zones and learn new things. Read about people or situations with descriptions of behaviors and values that are new to you. Visit groups and places with people who are different from your typical experience. Take some time and evaluate past relationships and situations  identifying common elements. Those are the familiar things. Once you are 'aware' of what it is that's 'familiar' you know where to begin to make changes. That's half the battle. Change one element in an equation and the answer or outcome will change. Take control of your brain by "changing" the things that are "familiar" to you. 

WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT?

WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT?

In learning to control our own brain, it's important to understand why we do what we do. A significant aspect of that is what motivates you. What is it that gets us to do the things we want to do and the things we must do but maybe don't really want to do? That would be motivation. 

As human beings, the way our brain works is, we are motivated in one of two ways. We are either motivated by moving 'toward' something we desire / want or we are motivated by moving 'away' from something we don't want / desire and are seeking to avoid. Some people are motivated to get up out of bed and get to work to 'avoid' being fired from their job. Other individuals are motivated to get up and get going because they look forward to the work they do. Some people buy flowers for a significant other on their birthday to 'avoid' an argument for having forgotten or disappointing them. Others buy flowers for their significant other because they love to see the surprise in their face or enjoy the feeling of making them happy.

Take control of your brain by becoming aware of how you are motivated. Then start choosing how you will be motivated. Assess the different areas of your life. How are you currently being motivated? Are you moving 'toward' something desired or 'away' from something feared or undesirable? Negative motivation robs our creativity and reduces our quality of life. We can change the nature of motivation by changing our thinking. Maybe you don't like your job, but you enjoy the freedom the paycheck gives you. Explore that area as a beginning to a shift in motivation. The moving 'toward' motivation is most powerful and continually opens new vistas in life. It gives you greater flexibility and control in your life. 

So, WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT?

LAW OF REVERSED EFFECT

LAW OF REVERSED EFFECT 

Our brain / mind is forward moving / thinking. It is always moving in the direction of our dominant thought. A key principle of controlling our own brain is to focus on getting the brain to "do" something, not "stop" doing something. If I say to you,"don't think of the color blue". What is the first thing you do? You think of the color blue in order not to think of the color blue. So then it's too late. Instead, if I said,"think of the color green." What do you do? You think of the color green. Control the direction of your thinking by continually thinking of what you want, not of what you don't want. If someone says to you,"now, don't be angry but..." What does your mind do? It immediately accesses being angry. Once again, it's too late.  My son used to spill his milk all the time. I was continually telling him," son, don't spill your milk!" What was I actually doing? I was ensuring he'd spill his milk. When I changed what I was saying to, "son, keep your milk in the glass unless you're drinking it." Amazingly, the spills stopped! The principle, get the mind to "do" something not "stop" doing something. Focus on what you really want, not on what you don't want. 

OUR BRAIN

               OUR BRAIN

I think it's safe to say that we all have a brain. I think we all also know of someone who causes us to wonder if they have a brain. Our brain operates according to some basic universal principles. When we are not directing our thoughts and running our own brain, our brain is being programmed  and run by someone or something else. Other people's comments may be running our brain, we may be continually reacting to their spoken expectations. Television and radio may be determining how we feel. It's as if someone else is driving our bus. They may have the best of intentions but they may not be driving where we want to go. It's time to take back control of your own life. We can do this by first learning how our brain works. Then applying the principles in our own lives. We can choose how to feel. We can decide to change a behavior. We can decide who and how we want to be and become that person. Over the next few days, I'll share some basic principles of how our brains work. You can test / apply them right away and experience the amazing results. It's time to drive your own bus!  It's time to start using our brains for a change. 

A THOUGHT ON THOUGHTS

  A THOUGHT ON THOUGHTS

A small and simple thing that is very powerful is a thought. The thing to remember about thoughts is that we become what we think about most of the time. Where you are today, what you are today, is the sum total of all the thoughts that you've had. If you remember, feelings, actions, outcomes, they all start with thoughts. So what you've thought up until now has got you to where you are today. That same process is working right now second by second, this very moment.  If you want to make a change, you need to change what you're thinking, and how you're thinking. An important fact is that what dominates your thoughts influences your results. What you think about most is affecting your results. Now here's where it gets real interesting. A simple yet extremely powerful key is that you've got to start thinking about what you're thinking about. We do this by asking ourselves questions like, "Why do I think that?" "Why am I saying that?" "Why do I feel like this in this situation?" "How do I feel about feeling angry?" "How do I feel about feeling frustrated?" So the place to begin is to start thinking about what you are thinking about!

MINNIE VACATION

          MINNIE VACATION  

Life in general is changing rapidly. The speed at which we now live can be exhausting. Companies and we as individuals are expected to do so much more with so much less. For so many, the day is busy and full from the time they awaken in the morning until they finally drop into bed late at night. They survive by looking forward to their annual vacation. This is that time away from work to relax, play, regenerate, explore new places and really live! This is a period of vacation and re-creation. It's when we can honestly live.  Let's quit "surviving" and allow ourselves to "live" everyday. A small and simple thing we can do that brings great benefits  is the minnie vacation. Everyday, take about five minutes, sit or lay down getting comfortable and using visualization, go on a minnie vacation in your head. Make it so real that you can see, hear, feel, smell and taste where you are and what you are doing. This five minute experience will allow for relaxation, regeneration and happiness along the journey. Remember, the subconscious mind cannot tell the difference between a real or imagined experience.  It is very powerful! Once again, small and simple things. 

A SIMPLE READ

      A SIMPLE READ

It is indeed by small and simple things that great things are brought to pass. Here now is another small thing that reaps great benefits. There are so many books available to us now. Our local libraries are full 

of books that we can borrow and read at no cost. If you have a smart phone, through various apps you can gain access to hundreds, even thousands of books. All too often we select a book only to lose interest part way through our reading. Now we've spent and wasted all that time. A very effective way to scan a book and gain at least 50% comprehension thus making better use of your reading time is the topical sentence approach. This is simply reading only the first sentence in each paragraph on every page of the book. In a well written book, the first sentence in a paragraph tells you what the paragraph is about. You can now fly through a book in a fraction of the time. If you find it interesting you can go back and read it. If you don't like the book, you've spent little time and can move on to another one. Another example where small and simple things bring great things to pass. 

JUST THINKING

             JUST THINKING

The truth is that this is the moment when we are either enjoying our life or not enjoying our life. What we are thinking at this moment is creating a feeling within our body now, and our experience of life tomorrow. There is no "out there" that can cause us to suffer because everything that unfolds in our world is a projection of what is going on within. Our world is a mirror of what we think and feel on the inside. It's not the world that causes the stress we feel, it's our thoughts about it, the story we tell ourselves of how it is. 

Stress or anxiety doesn't really exist in the world, but a lot of people engage in stressful thinking. When we are tense, relaxed, happy or sad, we are "Just Thinking!"

BE WHO YOU ARE

      BE WHO YOU ARE

Does it seem to you that you spend your whole life trying to please and help other people only to be rebuffed and falsely judged? Here is a thought to consider, "A man has need of tough ears to hear himself freely judged." You know no matter how careful and conscientious we may be, someone is always sure to misunderstand our actions and our attitude. If a person doesn't do anything, people will find fault with what he hasn't done. If he does something, then people will find fault with what he has done. You cannot please all the people all the time by trying to be all things to all people, then you never get a chance to express what you really are. Be who you really are. To be true to yourself, you must be yourself. When you are yourself, when you are genuine, not everyone will like you but they will respect you. Be who you are!

CHANGE DIRECTIONS

    CHANGE DIRECTIONS

When you make changes in your life you may temporarily get lost. If you are lost, double check your GPS and stop at a gas station and ask for directions. Make your course corrections and reach your destination. 

If you frequently lose jobs, get in to debt, have problems maintaining relationships, ask yourself, "Am I taking the right path?" It could be a serious problem. Whatever the path you're taking, it's showing you the unwanted results. 

You need to stop at the gas station of life and ask for further directions. AA, NA, Gamblers Anonymous, a credit counselor, or a therapist can change the course of your life. 

Become aware and admit you're lost. With the right guidance, you can reach the destination of happiness and success.